Uh, that was weird...

I just went into my upstairs bathroom, flipped on the light, and was promptly greeted with an explosion. The light bulb on the sconce by the mirror blew up. I have never known that to happen before. Anyone of you, my faithful reader(s), who can allay my fear that our home's wiring is irreparably dodgy? Please someone tell me that sometimes light bulbs in normal, safe homes shoot holes in themselves? Or was this just a warning shot? Should I be moving all my valuables to a secure location?


P.S. I find it funny that Firefox's spellcheck recognizes "dodgy" and "wonky", but not "bockety"

Norm's Bits

I've never seen the Larry King Show. I have, however, seen several comedians do impressions of Larry King, many of which include him just rambling through his thoughts, one after another. I have never understood why he would do this, or if he really even does it (The Google tells me that it's a column called "King's Things", but I'm still dubious). Lately, though, it seems that nothing I wish to share here is long enough for its own entry, so I'm gonna pull a Larry and do the random thoughts thing, no matter how inane it seems to be. It might be stupid, but it keeps me from posting this crap on Twitter or Facebook. So here goes:

The kitchen is almost done. But the closer I get to finished, the slower my progress seems to be.

I knit a hat, hoping to break through my lack of knit-ability lately. I started it, ripped it out because it was too big, reknit it smaller, and it's still too big. Still no mojo. Dammit.

The youngest member of the Deplume household starts kindergarten on Tuesday. I'm nervous as a cat about it (and that's saying something-- both of our cats are very nervous critters).

I intend to ditch my $40+ per month Verizon cell phone and get a Net10 one instead. I've procrastinated on it for almost three months, though, because I'm not sure how to switch the phone number over.

I'm going to try my hand into barefoot running. Maybe I should have said "dip my toes into barefoot running." No, that would be lame. Either way, I attempted it for the first time this week and it was not nearly as hard as I thought it would be.

I screwed up and took my daughter to the dentist for a cleaning after only five months instead of six. That's a $152 mistake, as insurance refused to pay for the visit and the fluoride treatment.

Until this morning, I had forgotten how much I like Big Lots. $1 nail polish? $2 Organic granola? What's not to love?

My daughter is at her first slumber party tonight. She thinks she will get homesick. The party is all of three blocks away.

I got a little bit of a sunburn today at the pool. I'm 37 years old. I should know better.

I think that's it for now.

Kitchen pictures

I'm in a knitting slump. I made a sock, it got set aside, I finally picked it back up and made it too short. I pulled out the toe and re-knit it, made it longer, and it's still too short. It's just par for the course lately. A while before that I crocheted a granny square. As I rounded the last corner of the second round, I realized that I had made a granny triangle. I also have a sweater that I started, and I keep thinking that I'll never be able to finish it, so why bother working on it at all. See? I have lost my mojo.

The upside to failing at the yarny arts is that I have been working on the long-suffering kitchen. (By the way, I do mean to say that it has been doing the suffering. The poor room has been terribly embarrassed at its state for more than three months now.)

This last weekend, I finally primed the walls (with a miracle product called Gardz) and then painted the ceiling. Of course I dislike painting ceilings on a good day, but painting over a mushroom-colored glossy ceiling is a special brand of Hell (should that be capitalized? I assume it's a proper noun, right?). After about three coats of ceiling paint, I was left with this (see what I mean about a sad kitchen?):


Yesterday, I decided to tackle the wallpaper. I was a little intimidated because A) it's only my second wallpapering project, the first one being the dining room a couple of years ago, and B)this random-looking wallpaper has a repeat which I really thought I was unable to find. But I pressed on, found the three tiny dots that signaled the pattern's matching point, and dove in. I was left with this.



It's the only wall that is done so far. I hope to get wall #2 done today. It's slow going because it's all windows and cabinets and doors everywhere, but I have hope for the future of my kitchen. Now if I could only happen upon a spare thousand dollars to have the floor replaced...

That figures.

First full day of vacation. Younger child under the weather. Just found that rechargeable batteries did not take the charge the other night. Trip to Target imminent.

Will update more colorfully soon.

In the mornings, Mr. Deplume is up and is gone for work before the kids and I awake. Our routine is such that he brews a whole pot of coffee, drinks some, fills up his brewed-but-cold moving sauce for my mornings. It works for me, because I am not a morning person and brewing coffee is pretty taxing on my barely awake brain.

Just to illustrate how very mushy my brain is in the mornings, I'll share with you an anecdote:
I just went to refill my coffee, but it was cold (obviously) so I headed through the kitchen to heat it up. I walked straight to the refrigerator, opened it, and started to put my cup in. At that point I got a breath of the cold air and thought "hey, that's not gonna heat up my coffee". So I felt silently embarrassed, walked back across the kitchen and heated the drink in the microwave.

I of course had to immediately share this via IM with Mr. Deplume, who is at work, and he replied thusly:
I was getting ready to brew the coffee here, filled up the carafe to pour into the Bunn... instead of doing that I walked into my office and poured cold water into my coffee cup. Guess we are on the same level of awareness this morning.

That is proof that we're soulmates, right?

Lots of stuff (I wish I had a better title, but it just ain't gonna happen)

It's been a busy few weeks in the Deplume household. There has been a garden planted, school year ended, kitchen cabinets painted, miles run, and anniversaries celebrated (our parents, not us-- ours is next month). I have taken pictures of a lot of it, but will only share a little here.

First off, a couple of weeks ago my mom and sister had a garage sale. I put some things out too, but I only made $12, so I don't think it really counts as my sale. My mother had this for sale. She got it at an auction with some other things, and didn't immediately notice anything other than the cute bunnies. I brought it home of course, thinking that I'd tuck it away for a risque gift-giving occasion. There are a few of my fellow yarnies on Ravelry who I think would particularly enjoy it.

There's a problem, however. Our son saw it and promptly claimed it as his cup. He wants to drink out of it all the time. He would be crestfallen if I took it away from him. This is another one of those situations that makes me wonder about this parenting gig. How am I supposed to explain why he cannot keep his beloved bunny mug? If I don't take it away, how long until he or his older sister figures it out? This is one of those things that will have us all in stitches as we reminisce around the Thanksgiving table in 2038, isn't it?

In other news, I finished the shawl that I thought would never end. In all honesty, it probably should be another inch or two bigger, but I just couldn't bear to knit anymore. It had been with me for 13 months now, and it was time to get those needles back. I think I'll make a sweater next-- with hopes that it would be done before fall sweater season, 2009. I don't hold out much hope on that, though. I do love the colors and the yarn is very soft, I hope that despite its petite-ness (petite-i-tude? petition?) I'll manage to use it lots.
Ravelry Link




There is more news (and pictures) to share, but it's now 6:52 PM and I'm the only member of the family not in my jammies yet, so it will have to wait until tomorrow. See you then!

I've gone high tech, I think

In an effort to make it easier for everyone to comment, I installed a new gadget that should allow you all to post comments without having to a) register/sign in to some web service and/or b) be 100% Anonymous.

In theory, you should be able to choose the "guest" option now, and then can type your name in the "nickname" box. Be warned, though, that if you forget to type something in for your nickname, it will name you "guest" and, well, that's no better than before.

If you have any problems, please email me your issues (normdeplume 720 at gmail dot com-- without the spaces, of course) so that I can try to fix them. I cannot seem to sign out enough to test it all for myself.

In which Norm is again stickin' it to the man

We love popcorn here at the Deplume household. I grew up in one of those homes where there was a dedicated popcorn-cooking pan. It was made in large enough quantities that there could be leftovers the next morning. It was a big deal.

However, when I grew up and Mr. Deplume set off to make our own household, we didn't have a popcorn pan. Nor did we have the room in our 465 sqft. apartment to have one, let alone an electric popcorn popper. The only 'real' option for us was to start purchasing microwave popcorn.

Problem is, microwave popcorn isn't any good. It's usually heavily-laden with that nuclear orange diacetyl (the butter-flavored chemical that tastes nothing like any butter I've ever encountered), salt (enough to kill a slug) and hydrogenated oils. Still, we stuck with it, addicted to the ease of plopping a packet into the nuker and pushing the "popcorn" button. I had resigned myself to doing this for the rest of my days.

But lately, we've been having troubles. First, our microwave was too small, so the bag would get stuck, burning the popcorn. Then, we upsized to a larger unit, only to find that the bag would still get stuck if we didn't center it right. There were other problems, all very irritating, which ended with one of two problems: unpopped kernels or charred popcorn-shaped briquettes.

So this morning I was avoiding housework (as usual)and started looking at popcorn poppers. Thanks to The Google's power, I happened upon this recipe for homemade microwave popcorn. I headed to the grocery store to buy popcorn and lunch sacks. Brought them home, threw 1/4 of corn in the bag with a drizzle of canola oil, folded it up, and two minutes later I had popcorn. Popcorn plus bag (both bought at full price in my little neighborhood grocery)cost $.27, which is considerably less than I normally pay for the pre-bagged stuff. Take that, Act II and all your friends on the convenience snack shelves!

I love being cheap-- bargains are fun.

Intoxication

I'm in full-on yard work mode right now. It's a neverending job, of course, but in the spring it is fun. It's not too hot, and I'm busy thinking of what my gardens could look like, with just the right amount of work and money and landscape know-how. (I don't really have the ability to follow through on that, but that's another post, to be tackled in August some time.)

But for now, I have my favorite bits of spring, the first buds on my roses, the little spinach leaves, the blossoms on peas, and my irises. These flowers are all gifts from other people's gardens, and I love them. While weeding this bed yesterday, I was accompanied by their wonderfully sweet scent, wishing that they'd stick around all summer long. However, in looking pictures of them, I am reminded of the constant problem of living where I do-- no picture of prettiness is without the ugliness of urban(ish) living.

Here, a photo of them shows off my neighbors' garbage cans and pool and shed. I've planted some roses near the alley to try to screen this from view, but it will be some time before they are large enough to do any good. I tried pictures from other angles, and the ones with our house in the background aren't much better. I'll fix that this year, right?

While the rest of life speeds up, Norm goes retro

I have a problem. The more I have things I need to finish, the more projects I choose to take on. It can be seen in the many WIPs in my yarn cupboard (not to mention the things sitting around the rest of the house, as my knitting ADD has outgrown the cupboard). It can also be seen in the fact that my kitchen isn't much farther along now than a couple of weeks ago when I posted pictures. I could blame the weather (wettest spring on record here in my neck o' the prairie), but the truth is, I decided to knit in public, and it took a lot of time.

While my kitchen cabinets remain doorless, and the walls remain paperless, I signed on to knit at an event celebrating my town's sesquicentennial (that's 1859, in case you didn't feel like doing the math). Never happy to do something the easy way, I decided to make a dress for the occasion. This is a bit of a silly idea, because I am not an experienced seamstress, nor have I even sewn more than a button onto anything in well over a year.

But I had the idea in my head, and would not be dissuaded. Of course I had to start out by spending a week trolling the internet for ideas of what to sew. Then I realized that any real pattern would set me back $15 or more, not to mention that my procrastination precluded me from really ordering one anyway, so I asked my mom to help me out. She took a blouse that fits me and drafted a pattern from it (talented family members are a must, when daring to craft beyond your skill level).

I managed to follow her directions and ended up with a bodice that fit (although not quite period-appropriate), and then decided to do the skirt the way a gal would have done it 150 years ago. I ended up with a sore hand and shoulder from pleating all 135" of the top of it, then hemming the other end and attaching it to said bodice, all by hand. It sure was fun, though (no kidding). The apron is a pillowcase, gathered and sewn to a band of old tablecloth. Luckily, I can whip up an apron pretty easily, so that was done last-minute with a minimum of cursing.

In the end I ended up quite pleased with myself. The garden plants I bought last week may still be languishing in their flats, the kitchen may be unfinished, the dining room is still unusable, being filled with the kitchen's misplaced bits and bobs and shelves and glasses, but I got lots of compliments from people who saw me yesterday. And then I went grocery shopping in the dress -- I figured if I spend an entire week making something, I'd better get some mileage out of it!

I'm such an attention whore. Sometimes I think that's why I craft things at all.

Too humid to paint, so I'll show you some progress pics instead,

I need to paint another coat on the wainscot. (This is a fancy misnomer. It's really beadboard-shaped paneling installed by previous owners. It was a very dark wood color before I got paint-happy with it.) Unfortunately, we're having an excessively wet spring and once again it's too humid to paint. That means that the refrigerator sits in the middle of the kitchen for at least one more day. *sigh*

But that does free me up to do some house cleaning. The work in the kitchen has caused a cessation of regular tidying in other parts of the house, although I wasn't exactly a fastidious housekeeper before. I need to reclaim my front room. It's become the wooden train set/Barbie spa room for a week now and it's bothering me. It is the only room that I really love, so it pays to keep it that clean. Also, I've been slacking in the laundry and dishes departments. Ugh. There's always a lot of those.

Anyway, back to pictures:
In February, Mr Deplume had had enough of the ugly kitchen, and started to strip the lower cabinets so we could repaint them.


There they sat, mostly stripped, for almost two months. Finally, last week, I started priming and painting, and also ripped out the soffits above the upper cabinets-- that amount of wasted space makes me twitchy. I did find that I really love the original wallpaper from when the kitchen was installed (early 60's maybe?)


Under the soffit I found a lovely copper sink vent, and some rather dodgy wiring for the over-sink light.


Here's the north side of the kitchen, before I started to paint the "wainscot." Please don't judge me by the mess inside that cupboard. It's where I cram all the stuff that doesn't fit neatly anywhere else.


The other end of the sink vent. And the 3" of window trim that was removed for the soffit. Ugh.


Bye Bye, ugly wallpapers!


So that's where we were the other day. I started to put the doors back on the lowers, but the hinges I bought were too thick (or maybe just poorly made), and I had to buy new ones. Of course the new hinges' mounting holes don't match up on the door side, so I need to break out the drill and make some adjustments. Nothing is ever easy peasy in this house.

And now I'm going to get the boy dressed and head to Menards to return the 10 pairs of hinges that I cannot use. We're all very excited about that. whoopdedoo!

Can't talk now

Too busy ripping apart the kitchen. And as always, every little job ends up ballooning to thrice its original size. But finally I'm seeing progress. We've repainted the lower cabinets and wainscoting, and after several days of humidity finally were able to put the new pulls on the drawers and re-install them.

Unfortunately, we've hinge replacement issues, so the doors remain on the front porch floor. Actually, there is one door that couldn't go back on its cabinet yet anyway, thanks to the boy who "accidentally" got his dirty foot on the wet paint.


what do you think?

and just like that, it's been a week

Actually, over a week since I last posted here. I love my blog, but somehow, my busy schedule of reading others' blogs just doesn't leave enough time for actually writing here. Go figure.

Anyway, I haven't been a total sloth. I'm working on a little knitted gift that I shan't reveal here until it's been presented (I'd hate to give away a secret like that), as well as continued work on the house and garden. Unfortunately, every step forward necessitates two steps back.

I planted some bare root roses, but then it snowed and I couldn't finish the rest of them.
Mr Deplume started the arduous task of removing the lava rock from along the side of the house, but there's so much dirt and other stuff in there, it's going to be a very long, slow process.

I started to fix the doors on the front porch, but they were in such disrepair that after a couple of hours working on them, I just removed them altogether. WE've decided that this was a sign that we ought to just remove the porch's windows and revert it back to a proper front porch. (I'm struggling now not to just start demolition willy nilly.)

Since it's a little cold and muddy out, I have to settle for laundry duty today. It's not nearly as fun as crow bars and hammers.

Charity work

Earlier this month I knit these for Citizen Sam (they recently took over Operation Helmetliner), and finally got around to weaving in the ends and taking pictures this week. I have a bad habit of finishing projects quickly, then letting them languish about for weeks (or months, in some cases) with just a stray yarn end or half a bind-off to do. Too bad procrastination isn't a marketable skill-- I could be rich. Rich, I tell you!
The beanie is Ellen's Hat from The Ships Project (Ravelry link), and the neck gator (although I think it ought to be spelled "gaiter") is from the Citizen Sam website. (No Rav pattern link for this one that I could find. I'm also too lazy to bother adding it to their database.)


BTW, on the gaiter/gator I used a sewn cast off that I read about in Elizabeth Zimmermann's Knitter's Almanac, and I really like the effect. It's nice and stretchy, and at the same time is a little less bulky than my standard bind off. That EZ sure was one smart cookie.

This isn't funny, Mother Nature.

It's March 29. Last night, after a horrible gloomy day of rain, we got snow. Five inches of wet snow. Just like that, all my hope for spring is dashed. I awoke this morning to find that we are back in the dead of winter. I didn't cover any of my outdoor plants yesterday-- I hope nothing is too damaged.

Cutting the cord.

We've been paying $58 a month for Directv for many years (well, it used to be cheaper, but they kept adding crap we don't use, and upping the price). After a very frustrating afternoon yesterday, I mentioned to Mr Deplume that we ought to just get rid of the cable/satellite altogether and just use an antenna and the Internet for our television enjoyment. He bristled at first-- he'd have to give up ESPN! How could he get through a morning without Sportscenter?

But just moments later he saw our 4-year-old beg for another toy that had been pimped on a commercial, and he came around. So after a little talking and futzing with the computer to allow us to watch Burn Notice and Psych episodes on the TV set without cable, the decision was made. This morning I will be calling DirecTV, telling them to just come and pick up their crappy HD receiver that doesn't work on our television and canceling our service.

Last night I went through the massive Tivo Season pass list and deleted all the pay-tv shows. Bye Bye, Food Detectives, see ya around, Mythbusters. Au revoir, Gardening By the Yard. It will be tough without you.

The children will probably have the biggest adjustment. They are used to having 10 different cartoon channels standing by, ready to placate them at a moment's notice. I've saved a few recorded programs for them on the Tivo (I love love love my Tivo), and will be buying some more kid-friendly DVDs. Once summer is here, this will all be easier, as they really love playing outdoors anyway. I know that families are happier with less TV, but the next couple of weeks will try all of our patience, I suspect.

We'll be better for it, right?

I hate Directv right now. A lot.

Directv emailed me a couple of months ago, telling me that I needed a new dish and receiver, because they were switching satellites. I made an appointment for today between 12 and 4. I was pleasantly surprised when the guy showed up at 11:58 AM. He promptly got to work, and now I only have one dish in my yard, which is an improvement,

However, this new box they forced me to get is an HD receiver, one which does not work with my Tivo, my tv, or my Directv account. Because I don't have and HDTV. I have a regular tv. A normal big fat standard definition television. It won't allow my beloved Tivo to change channels to record. I'm getting a little jittery just thinking about it. How on earth can I be expected to watch shows when they are actually on? That's not how I roll.

So I called the handy phone number they had given me and went through the "are you sure you plugged into the wall" questions, and eventually got them to believe me and transfer me to the technical support department. I explained to him that it won't chance channels properly , and then I sat on the line with him for nearly 15 minutes while he breathed into his headset and typed on his keyboard. After the 15 minutes, he said "there's nothing we can do for you."

And I said "no, you need to fix this."

He said, "well, Directv upgraded your receiver, but didn't charge you for the service call, nor did they force you to pay for HD service, so there's nothing more I can do. Since the the problem is with the Tivo, maybe you should call them to see if they've found a solution" As if it's Tivo's fault.

I relized I was not going to get anywhere with the Directv guy, so I actually tried calling Tivo. The girl at the other end of that call was more sympathetic, but had no decent answers for me and put me on hold to find out about new products that they might have for me. I waited a couple of minutes, but eventually hung up.

And then I did what any other sane person would, I shopped for DishNetwork and Mediacom deals on the internet. Unfortunately, once the honeymoon with those folks is over, their customer service would be just as bad.

I just called DirecTV again, got a standard customer service guy and he said "they shouldn't have given you an HD receiver, they can come out on Monday to reinstall a regular one."

What?

I just spent 3 godforsaken hours on phone calls to people who don't give a shit, repeating the modern-day custserv mantra: "I'm sorry that must be frustrating for you", and it turns out I got the wrong receiver in the first place?? What the hell? I think I might be more angry than I was when I though the programmers of the new-fangled boxes had made a mistake and they were just stupid. I might still cancel the DirecTV just to make a point. I wish I weren't so addicted to a few cable TV shows, or I'd just cancel it altogether and switch to using just Netflix and Hulu and iTunes for my boob tube-type enjoyment.

And people wonder why a little part of me wants to go live with the Amish?

Something to report!

Sorry folks, for being absent so long. I just had nothing all that interesting to write, so I didn't bother. But this weekend saw something done to the house, so I took pictures. On Saturday I got all twitchy about the 40+ feet of yew bushes along the south side of my house and started sawing them down. With my neighbor's trusty hand saw, I deleted three of the overgrown buggers with my bare hands. I unfortunately have no photographic evidence of said bushes-- I neglected to take 'before' pictures.

On Sunday, Mr. Deplume borrowed a friend's chainsaw (we really do have tools of our own, just not the correct ones for this particular job) and went to work on the rest of them. Within an hour or so we went from this (the bush-free part of the house to the left of the screen is where the bushes I removed had stood):

From House

to this:

From House

I count it as an improvement, although removing the one very large eyesore revealed many little ones. There is a water meter, electric meter, air conditioning unit, furnace vents, a few miscellaneous wires and boxes for phone and electricity, a defunt cable hookup and chunk of broken veneer on the foundation we hadn't noticed before. Of course there are still 40-year-old yew stumps that need to be dealt with, as well. I foresee a bunch of my summer being involved in installing trellises and fences and camouflage plants. 'Tis the fun of home ownership, I suppose.

Eww.

Note to self: Do not look up ways to prevent apple pests whilst eating breakfast. Not only are the pictures of the caterpillars yucky, but reading the words of one cheeky organic grower put me right off my feed. What were the words, you ask? Why of course they were "where's the other half of the worm?" blarf. Anyway, after wasting about an hour on the internet trying to become an expert on organic orchard maintenance, I think I'll just call my local Extension office and let them tell me what to do.

On a happier note, reading about apples and orchards always makes me sing this song.

Happy Thursday to you

I don't have much to post here, but I have a few minutes to waste, so here I am. Not much knitting progress lately. I've been working exclusively on the entrelac afghan project. It's slow going, though. I'm most of the way through the next row of it, but then the kids both got sick (and have been trying to take me down with them), and every time I sit down it's more to snuggle than to knit. I'm not complaining, though. They are only little kids for a very short time and I am increasingly aware of how fast time flies.

I'm hosting a craft night at our church tonight. I hope it goes well. If there are a lot of people there, we'll need to meet in the Parish Hall, where the light isn't bright. If we are a smaller group, we can meet in a different room with better light. I hope it catches on. A few knitters (and a crocheter) have been meeting on Wednesday mornings for over a year now and we have a great time. But those people who work during the day cannot come. Also, scrapbookers and jewelry makers and woodworkers cannot really work at a coffee shop. *fingers crossed*

I'll post a progress pic of the afghan tomorrow, and maybe I'll frog another failed WIP, too, just for good measure. I'm really wanting to get all the unfinished business cleared up so I can start on some new stuff. I've got a hankering to knit another pair of socks.